the rectum is nightmarishly elastic

i usually write about my feelings, if i write at all. but i'm a so-called english major, so i have some problem with this fact. i'm too emotional- that's not to be taken lightly- so this blog will be dedicated to my anti-emotional side. i know i have one, i feel it every day. for some reason i don't tend to feel it, though, when i sit down to write.

so this blog will be an experiment for me, as well it is for numerous thousands of others, i've noticed. we're all still experimenting with what the internet is and has to offer, which i find odd, seeing as how we've been using it regularly for more than a decade already. that may not be long in the span of our lives, but for those of us still in our twenties, more than a decade is half of our lives. and that's a long time. yet, we're still experimenting. we're such slow-learning babies.

i was reading a copy of smithsonian magazine today, an issue from november last year. it was an issue honoring the 40th anniversary of john f. kennedy's assasination. my parents generation of september 11th. everyone remembers where they were, what they were doing, and exactly how they felt. 40 years later. it was touching, an article of testimonials about how the president impressed so many prominent americans. bb king said kennedy was not only the kind of president people loved, but the kind of president people wanted to help. "ask not what you can do..." black people, specifically, felt the president wanted to help them. that was bb's perspective, anyway. others were less congratulatory, which surprised me a bit. surprised me in the way i was surprised by all the negative commentary during the flying back and forth of a dead ronald reagan. it still seems so wrong to talk bad about the deceased, no matter how honest or true. tom clancy, for instance, is not a kennedy fan. although he was only 13 at the time of the assassination, he had an opinion, and it was less than complimentary. the best he could say was that he never wished death on the man. somebody else said something about not judging a president for his personal decisions, but for the decisions that defined his presidency. i couldn't agree more, and that goes for clinton, too, obviously.

my boyfriend downloaded some stand up of the guy on king of queens today. not the main guy, but the short guy who insists he's not gay. he's like the best friend that's not the huge black guy. you know who i'm talking about. he's funny. he's of the david cross, sarah silverstone (?), north carolina school. funny as hell. i'm not going to attempt to relay any of his jokes, but his first name is patton. i can't remember his last name. this isn't the best plug a guy could get, i realize. regardless, it got me thinking about what i would do if i were to win a million dollars. i'd produce a variety show. patton something could be the host.